I will survive Paris and write a poem about it

I spent a few days in Paris, recorded everything with my fujifilm X100F, reflected on time and wrote a poem. here it is.

I will survive Paris and write a poem about it

for many people Paris have this dreamlike aura
this ideal romantic getaway
I dreamt of it as a kid
I saw myself moving to Paris
one day
and become someone

it was my first time living alone
and Paris transformed me
not in a funny way

I found so much darkness there
and at some point I couldn’t take it anymore
I needed some light
so I left

but I see why people like it
when I come back for a while
I too, can finally appreciate its beauty

I find it surreal that so many people
can be in the same city at the same time
and experience it in so many different ways
one is having a honeymoon
another a breakup

my favourite activity in Paris
has always been to watch people
because no one notices you
yet you notice everything

there was this guy waiting outside of universtiy
every day
he always wanted to start a conversation
but the words would never
come out of his mouth on time
I thought he was mad
but later I got to know that
he was selling postcards
and he would tell you about them
if you had enough time to listen to him
and I felt bad
I’ve never seen him since
he always wore a yellow raincoat
and looked as if he were sorry to exist

but coming back to Paris
always makes me feel like visiting my past
I always visit the same old places
the ones that used to mean something
to mean home, to be home
my first appartment
my last appartment
where I would do my laundry
where I would buy my cigarettes

when I first moved there
I fell asleep to the sound
of mice sharpening their teeth in the staircase

years later, in another place,
I ended up falling asleep to the reflection
of the Eiffel tower light in my mirror
turning around and around
drawing a circle of light
in the night sky

I have a hard time with nostalgia
I don’t really like it
I don’t like to feel it
it breaks my soul
because I cannot stop time
I can only visit my past as a temporary guest

we live in a great happening
all we do is witnessing the passage of time

#digitaldiary #quietvlog #poetry #cinematic #lifeinparis